This week I saw a popular American menopause expert post a photo of Republican presidential candidate Nikki Haley and suggest that her oratory skills, brain power and youthful looks at 51 make her a poster child for the benefits of taking menopause hormone therapy, I could not believe my slightly dry menopausal eyeballs when she went on to suggest that if only Hillary Clinton had taken HrT, things might have gone better for her.
I had to leave a comment (the copy editor in me can be hard to restrain). It was: ‘Do we know Nikki Haley takes hormone therapy?’. I should have added: ‘And how do we know Hillary didn’t/doesn’t?’ (If anyone can point me to evidence of either, please do. These things are kind of hard to confirm.)
You will just have to trust me on the one-time existence of this post as it has since been deleted. I’m guessing that’s because someone dared to mention a Republican in a positive light on social media, not because it is the clearest indication yet of the Estrogen Maximalist push to Robert Wilson’s Feminine Forever 2.0.
I need to get better at getting screenshots of some of the more outrageous stuff that Doctor Menopause Gurus (DMGs) are posting these days.
It’s getting wild, you guys.
peri power tool
As I structure my post-menopause life, I’m being reminded of how chaos-filled my perimenopause existence has been. I’ve been struggling for a long time with a morning routine and a nightly wind down. I know if I get outside for some sunlight and put down my phone at night, my sleep will be better. One thing that’s helping with all this? I heard my girl Mel Robbins talking about dividing her days into 5 Zones, with 1 and 5 being the most important. In Zone 1 she drinks water, high-fives herself in the mirror (a cat works, I think), walks for at least 10 minutes outside, listening to nothing, then comes back in to make notes on what she thought. In Zone 5 the phones go away and you prep for the next day.
menopause is having more than a moment
US: It’s really fun to see many of the women I’ve connected with or interviewed take this fight for more menopause research all the way to the White House. Joined by Halle Berry, no less! The change is sweeping, and it’s more than just a moment. For example watch Berry talking to US senator Cory Booker about menopause here, and try to imagine an Oscar-winning actress and a US senator discussing this subject even a year ago. Groundbreaking. For more about the Menopause Research and Equity Act, go to Let’s Talk Menopause.
INDIA, CHINA, BRAZIL + MEXICO: Global healthcare and research firm Abbott is taking its The Next Chapter menopause campaign forward with two sets of cards: a scenario set driven by real-life stories collected from women in India, China, Brazil and Mexico, and a story set that involves open-ended questions to start conversations about menopause and midlife wellbeing in general. The global healthcare and research firm partnered with Ipsos for a survey in 2022 that had a number of important findings, including that 80 percent of women believe menopause impacts their wellbeing. It was also the rare survey to talk to husbands, and 92 percent reported believing that their wives need to talk about what they are going through. The campaign has teamed up with actress and former Miss Universe Lara Dutta, who is intent in breaking down the considerable stigma that still exists surrounding menopause in her country, India.
headline hysteria
Where the media makes it sound like we are dying…
• The Manchester Evening News finds a woman having the worst menopause ever (or maybe she’s got some other, undiagnosed problem?): 'My menopause symptoms mimic dementia —-I'm trapped in the body of a 90 year old'
• MSN offers that old chestnut: A doctor said my tiredness was the menopause – then I was diagnosed with incurable cancer
what I’ve learned from menopause, by me
I think all the damaging things we’ve done to ourselves over the years to escape feeling emotional pain (numbing with alcohol, drugs, shopping, eating, people, busyness, work, TV, scrolling, disassociating, disconnecting, abandoning ourselves, fleeing, fawning, and people-pleasing, etc) stop working as our hormones recede. The bill for all of those behaviors arrives in the mail and the collectors get louder and more insistent as perimenopause marches on. Our cognitive dissonance and emotional pain grow if we persist in using them, if we resist feeling. This is a form of stress, and we know from the research that stress contributes to worsened menopause symptoms. I now don’t treat thoughts about my past or my life now as random. I treat them as reminders of things unprocessed that are calling for my attention. There are often tears, then relief. This is changing everything.
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editor’s note
• Celebrity I’m excited to see speaking out about menopause (and who is clearly planning something): Maria Bello via Vanity Fair
• Article I’m not reading: Anything offering to help me with the burden of menopause and Christmas. Considering what some people are dealing with right now, I think I can manage this one.
• Thing I’m getting myself for Christmas that I’ve been meaning to get myself for a long time: The DNA Company’s DNA 360 Report. Use code HOTFLASHINC to get 10 percent off.
AMx
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I LOVED that episode where Mel Robbins explained the 5 Zones 🤍
I'm turning 60 in a few months, and am beginning to see how walking on eggshells in my childhood shaped my self-concept and my tendency to take emotional responsibility for other people's pain or anger. Huzzah! Breaking through, realizing what's NOT MINE, is setting me up for a healthier last third of my life. Thank you for writing about this, Anne Marie!